Today I was going to do a blog on the new bulletin I made with my students this week but events, like life, come at us - slapping us upside the head - when we least expect it. When I got the news last night that another sister had a life threatening illness, coming on the heels of losing our sister Barbara so recently, I felt so many things it's hard to put it in words. After the initial shock, the numbness, the anger, I found myself digging in the spare bedroom closet, obsessed with finding my 'Team Chandler' hat. As you can see I found it - I've been wearing it nonstop all day today. Team Chandler was formed to ride the PMC (Pan Massachusetts Challenge) bike trek this past August; the ultimate goal was to raise money for cancer research but we all knew it was a mission of love for our sister who was dieing of cancer.. Those that rode included my youngest sister and her fiance - it is for her that we metophorically hop back on those bikes.
Over the past months I learned that the human body, and spirit is capable of surpassing all limitations when caring for those we love. One can hurdle over the challenges of all that we thought we could never do - we become somewhat invincible.
So why the scotch tape? Good question. Today I felt the fissures of emotion, albiet the cracks in the damn, get a little bigger. For the past several months I've kept them at bay with what I pictured as glue but today it seems that all I can come up with - is tape.